The viewing. How hard can it be?

the viewing – how hard can it be?

Hard is the short answer! Think about it, two sets of humans, who are utter strangers are meeting in a very personal and intimate space that belongs to the owner. Immediately there is an inherent imbalance of power. Whilst nothing is said, the power dynamic is present, and this can play out in a countless number of scenarios, some of which, can be hilarious, but not always. Sometimes it can be incredibly tense and excruciatingly awkward.

geek’s ideal viewing scenario is to show an empty house; one where the owners and any other inhabitants are out; away from the home, and we are safe in the knowledge, the owners will not return during the time you are there presenting their home. However, plainly speaking, the glaring reason why this is the ideal, is because it gives the prospective buyer the space to talk freely and roam. To explore, to imagine and to visualise, and not to have to necessarily be overtly polite and mindful of the fact they are guests. Taste is a common arena for differing points of view, but there are also many others!

Whilst we may not agree with the prospective buyers’ views and opinions, you can safely navigate any awkward comments, secure in the knowledge that no one else is listening and no offense will be caused. You may dislike them, but you are not there to judge, you are simply there to provide a service.

But with the epic rise of ‘woke awareness’, many humans are floundering. Has it gone too far? Vital effort is needed to learn, understand and appreciate the injustices that are deeply rooted in our everyday language and our common practices. Age plays a huge factor here, as many of us are familiar with how some word usage has changed, ‘gay’, being a common cited instance; and how, for example, we would now refer to a blind person as visually impaired.

The perennial ‘power struggle between progressive and conservative values’ is ever-present, even during a mere agent’s viewing! At geek we thrive on emotional intelligence and contributing to a more peaceful society - less angry people in it would be bliss!

How to say something and what to say, are not always easy and at times it feels like a minefield; but if something is said, rather than a ‘knee jerk dismissal of something as woke’ (Maynell) ultimately wouldn’t it be preferable to talk and seek understanding, we all make mistakes. As opposed to making a self-righteous choice to defend your comments, be humble and try remaining open to new knowledge and understanding; this is what makes us more empathetic. And, at geek, we think, the world needs a huge spoonful of empathy right now.

Get off the defensive and embarrassed trajectory and be more open. We all make mistakes, just own it! I have had many an awkward moment, being an ex-teacher, I have made errors, particularly with gender, and it really is how you act in that moment, that what will make a difference.

geek have witnessed many an awkward moment where the prospective buyer and the seller’s paths have crossed, and whilst, there is a vast wilderness of exchanges that can be had, and some are and have been pleasant, and often humorous – even friendships have been made. But of course, there is a flipside, and the steering of murky waters is more common than you may think.

geek have many viewing stories we could tell, where, one has wished the floor would swallow you up, but instead you are left to act like a frenzied game show host, trying to please everyone: the dynamics of the viewing are far more complex than what you would think!

Take for example, the stereotypical teenage boy’s bedroom, where the walls are laden with posters of semi naked ladies. So much so, that you cannot find a place to rest your eyes, that gives you any comfort. You blindly hope perhaps, the prospective buyer won’t notice, but that is never going to happen! You try in vain to get them to take in the view from the window of the garden, or to examine the plentiful built in wardrobes, but alas as you open the wardrobe door, there too sits a naked lady, who is now even closer to your eyeline, you frantically look for another distraction, but there are not many!

Pictures of sexualised women are continually and rightly so a subject of contention for a plethora of reasons, but imagine, if your buyer, had, had a nasty and frightening experience, that in someway linked to these types of pictures, and opening a door to see a room bursting at the seams with bosoms and butts, could act as some sort of trigger? If they were unable to hide their discomfort and distress, are they being too irrational? Who is qualified to make that decision?

Cooking smells invite a lot of uncomfortable commentary and exaggerated facial expressions to convey a dislike for the aroma. You find yourself in the awkward spot of needing to make a swift decision as to whether you ignore the buyers’ reactions and pretend you have not noticed, or do you smile politely, or give them a glare at their impending rudeness. Yes, they may have a sensory smell processing issue, but does that make it ok for derogatory comments? If you draw their attention to what they have said, is this the right moment to do so? If could and likely will go against you, if your boss is single minded and profit is their only mantra, what could that mean? You are bad mouthed, your company loses a sale…, you then get sacked by your boss!

Interior walls loaded with royalist pictures and royalist ornamental memorabilia is not an unusual sight in this industry. But can be quite a shocker, for some, who may not necessarily be anti royalist but culturally and socially, remain indifferent to our royal family and its history. There has been many a facial retort in these moments: eyebrows are a common giveaway for what someone is thinking, and usually, but not inevitably a slippage of the tongue accompanies the raising of the brow, and you again find yourself in an awkward moment.

Whilst the owners revere our royals, and we may venomously disagree, does that give us or the potential buyer the right to criticise? Am I being oversensitive by thinking this? What if the owner overheard them? Is that, ok? After all, the buyers are guests, even if it is just for 20 minutes, they are still guests in their home.

At times, when the buyer has departed, the seller, can be just as prone to denigrating, but this changes the power dynamic, as this time it is the person paying your fees, and you as the humble servant, are already on a back foot for being seen as less than. At geek we have heard unrepeatable comments that are discriminatory. At times, in that moment, you are left speechless, as you do not have the processing time, that is necessary to work out what to say and how to say it. Does this make us complicit? When money and power are involved, there are often morality issues.

I once had a seller who used the most awful word to describe the colour of his bathroom suite. I was so shocked that it had come out of his mouth, my impulse was anger and to exclaim how could he say that. Needless to say, we didn’t get the instruction. I didn’t particularly want the instruction as the thought of dealing with such ignorance made my skin crawl, but it was a very saleable house and we did lose money, but fortunately my boss shared my perspective and was cool, but this is rare in the world of sales.

Is the woke intervenor been out of order for calling out a buyer or even a seller for saying or acting in arguably an insensitive manner? Where is the line? Ultimately what we are trying to achieve is to increase mutual understanding and kindness.

Bibliography.

Maynell, L. the conversation.com “Here’s what ‘woke’ means and how to respond to it” https://theconversation.com/heres-what-woke-means-and-how-to-respond-to-it-219588 20 December, 2023.

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